WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES
Some of my fellow campers and I were working our way through the Book of Psalms and arrived at Psalm 37. One line stood out. Verse 4 says, "...Find your delight in the Lord who will give you your heart's desire." It provoked a discussion about what does one's heart desire?
Recently, my heart desired a Giant's victory in the World Series. I admit it is a silly subject to bring before God, but the Giant's post season had been a great source of joy for my wife and children and me. It gave us all a shared rooting interest in something. It was positive and fun and it distracted us from the economic uncertainty of the times and the residual pain caused by my stupidity. The World Series win was a poignant moment allowing us to reminisce about many things including my father's and their grandfather's role in bringing the Giants to San Francisco.
Today, when pressed, I was not able to clearly articulate my deepest and most profound heartfelt desires. As I weighed options, it became clear my heart desires my family to be safe. I desire my wife and children be happy and free from fear. I couldn't come up with anything for myself. It was all external to me. My heart desires my children to persevere in the face of adversity and to be compassionate and honorable. I desire my wife find peace and realize how much I love her. All of the above would be good, but somehow it doesnt answer the question enough. The question seems to require a deeper level of awareness.
The easy devotional answer is to desire to go to heaven. I dont know what that means ultimately and neither does anyone else. Besides, the Psalmist is writing about "now" and Jesus tells us He came to bring us life and life to its fullest now, not later in heaven.
My heart desires to love and be loved. Nothing would be more pleasing than to be able to open each day with a song of praise and gratitude for all I have been given instead of a litany of complaints and grievances which is how we usually greet each day. To pray and feel the presence of God would be a boost to my spirit. Too many times, like Mother Theresa, I feel totally alone. I desire to be a better person, husband, friend and parent. My heart desires to never again let pride lead me to decisions and choices which hurt so many especially me. My heart knows God forgives the moment we sincerely ask. Now, I desire the help to forgive myself which I cannot seem to accomplish.
Every day you are inundated with messages about what your heart should desire. Our society depends on your desires and then your consumption. 2/3 of our economy depends on you desiring an Ipad, Iphone, new car, new clothes, to desire to acquire and gather. How subversive is it to suggest we desire to improve ourselves, be thankful, help those least fortunate and not worry about "stuff" so much? How dangerous is it if Americans answer this question with a desire to be better stewards of the earth, more protective of true valuables and committed to a "full" life rather than a "filled" life?
If today, right now, God would be willing to fulfill your heart's desire, what would it be? Can you articulate what you really want? If not, why not? If you know your heart's desire, why aren't you living in such a way as to make it real?
You all lead oppressively busy lives. You would love an extra hour each day or a respite from the constant demands and pressure. How does one discern their heart when they dont even have time to stop and take a breath? Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on your perspective, I have a lot of time to ponder questions. This and others like it have to be answered. I'm working on it. When will you have the time to figure out what you really desire?